We're now on our 3rd day in training and I must say I am having so much fun and learning so much... well more like remembering the days when I was in tech support. :)

I'm enjoying training so much and the schedule.  I get to sleep longer and go to work as a normal human being!  Our schedule is 10AM to 7PM and I'm so loving it!  Anyway I got so fired up and decided to take it a step further.  Will be going back to school to study Linux Administration and Networking soon.  I'm so excited!

Been out of the weather since Sunday (coming from my long vacation).  I think I had too much alcohol.  Too much of a good thing can sometimes be bad!  Hehehe!  I took meds for the liver and it gave me comfort after...  The thing is, last night when I thought I was feeling better,  it happened again.  Ok, I'm a workaholic! I still went to work although alot of my friends have been telling me not to.  I just had to go.  I was absent for two days (wed and thurs) because there was a problem with the scheduled leave due to some changes in our shift.

My co-workers are so sweet!  They wanted me to die!  Just kidding!  I was having a hard time breathing this morning and had to go to the clinic for the first time since I worked here in Dell.  The nurse was accommodating but I guess he wasn't sure if I was just faking it because I was cracking jokes here and there!  That's me... even in times of emergency I still get to show my funny side!  Anyway they checked my Blood Pressure and Pulse and found nothing wrong with me.  The nurse asked if I have asthma... I said I used to have when I was a kid but that was a long time ago!  Dang!  I don't wanna have asthma now that I'm older!  That's just too WEAK!

They then said I may just be suffering from an ANXIETY Attack!   Who?  Me?  I don't think so!  I mean, I don't totally love my work but it pays the bills... I was just doing an impersonation of Ryan from American Idol infront of my co-workers when I started having a hard time breathing again.  Anyway, I'll try to sleep early today and see if I feel better tonight.

Have you ever felt that you're working so hard and yet it's not worth it?  I've been working since I can remember and until now I can't find the fulfillment I'm looking for.  I remember when I started working when I was in college.  I was so excited back then... finally independence!

I moved out when I was 17... tried living on my own and experienced life at it's best and it's worst!  I remember a time when I had to trade partying just for me to survive and have something on my table to eat.  Guess I was so stuborn to ask for help from my parents back then...  left the country when I was 25 to try my luck elsewhere.  It was a humbling experience for me.  To those who worked abroad, you know what I mean.  I thought at first the moment I leave this country everything will be nice.  Yes in a way it is better in another land... but there are times that I wanted to just fly back home and rest.  You have to really work to survive especially when there's no one you can turn to but yourself.

10 years after I'm back to my parent's house... yeah it's kinda weird going back to the place that you left and again live under the roof and rules of your parents... but hey this is only temporary.  I decided to go back home due to practical reasons... I wanna save enough so I can start my own business.

I don't wanna work for someone and make them rich my whole life... I wanna do something for myself... explore posibilities... and see what my capabilities can take me.  I admire those who at a young age has already started in making things work for them and finally escaping the rat race.

Right now I feel like I am a rat in this small cake trying to run after that cheese hanging in front of me but no matter how hard I try I can never get to it... guess why?  I'm running on a spinning wheel.  Stumbling and getting up and learning from my mistakes but no matter how much I learn and how hard I try I am still in this spinning wheel... I have to find a way to get out of here and go after my dreams.

Only thing is I haven't decided yet on what business I should venture into and where I can get enough capital to fund it...

My options...

Stick with my job and save as much as I can and slowly put up my business (this will take longer but will be the safest way)

Get a higher paying job... I'm thinking of working back in the cruise industry or get a job outside... A few years and I would have saved enough. (this might work but I don't wanna be away for so long... it's hard to leave people you love behind)

Apply for a loan (Risky but the easiest)

Get partners (Might work)

Rob a bank! (Fastest way to get into prison! Hahaha!)